August 15, 2017 (Tuesday)

by Yule Heibel on August 14, 2018

A deeply clouded day …in many ways. I woke to this dimness after sleeping fitfully. A plane, just a tiny toy-sized shape, has rounded north from Logan and, already high on the high high horizon, has just turned toward the west. It’s already out of sight now; they are fast, even though they look slow. Another plane just came into view. It’s definitely not climbing as much – maybe it’s even on a flight path to Logan? Now a gull, through a trick of perspective seemingly the same size as the planes, flaps its way energetically along what looks like (but isn’t) a similar path.

I’m that gull perhaps. I’m definitely not the plane, I fear. Would I like to be the plane? Probably. But I’m lazy. I can’t seem to get things done – so I’m probably not even the gull with its strong wings. I am ground-bound. Don’t like it. Liked seeing more of the sky out my window, too – now there’s too much earth-generated vegetable matter obscuring my view. (These trees have to go!)

Actually, the trees are earth-generated, but without the sky-sun, they wouldn’t exist. None of us would. A very symbiotic relationship? Not sure that’s the right word. The clouds look pretty, even if they are far too darkening on this mid-August morning, this early morning. The temperature is cool; I like it, personally. Tomorrow it’s supposed to shoot up again, with unclouded sun beating down. I’ll be uncomfortable. I’ll be distracted; I’ll go to see Nikki in S. to get my eyebrows done, and then I’ll drive A. to Logan Airport, from whence all those planes I’m seeing this morning originate …or where they’re landing. He leaves for Berlin via Reykjavik at 7p.m. He already has parties lined up, which is as it should be.

I must chop these trees down. They’re useless, no good at all. Useless to me: they obscure my view, dim my perspective.

Because it was cool, I closed the windows – and it was like turning on the switch for noise-canceling on my headphones. I want my quiet back, but I want to find more than vegetable life when I step outside.

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